Common questions

Couples come to me with a variety of difficulties. Common challenges include intimacy, affection, trust and commitment, disconnected values and goals, conflict, sex, parenting, money, housework, boundaries and in-laws. Some are going through separation and divorce, or re-partnering and building a blended family.

Conflict can get stuck and fail to be repaired. Trust may have been broken, by an affair or in other ways. That is where our work together can lead to real change.

No. I work with couples of all kinds: married or not, newly together or decades in, and families blended in every way. If you are thinking about getting married or having children, this is a good time to get help.

When you feel that you need help to resolve difficult and intractable issues, that communication is not getting through, and there seems to be no way forward. Also, if you are aware that your relationship is “okay” but seems to be lacking closeness and intimacy, don’t wait until it is too late. Seek help to make your relationship stronger, deeper and more passionate.

I recommend starting with three to five sessions, weekly or fortnightly, so the work has some continuity. From there, we meet at a frequency that suits the two of you and your life. The goal is to ensure you can then do the work on your own and only reconnect for check-ins or because a crisis has occurred.

Choose a calm moment, not the middle of an argument. Talk about what you want for the relationship rather than what’s wrong with them: “I want us to feel closer, and getting help is how we stop the cycle.”

That’s okay. Change can start with one of you. What you do makes a difference, so even coming alone can result in significant change.

In your first session I get an understanding of both of you. I hear the history of your relationship and what has brought you here, in your words, so I can understand what you need. This gives me the context of your individual histories and how the relationship has changed over time. We will discuss methods and goals.

Yes, what we discuss in sessions is confidential and won’t be shared with anyone without your written permission, except where I am legally obliged to share it.

Yes, online sessions are available. You need to ensure your internet connection is stable and that you can sit next to each other in front of the camera.

Yes. I would strongly encourage getting counselling before you make that deep commitment, so that you have the right tools and skills to build a marriage that lasts and grows.

Private health insurance rebates may be available. If you are unsure, I can help you work out what to ask your fund. Medicare doesn’t cover sessions with a counsellor, so no Medicare rebate is available.

Couples who are looking for accelerated, intensive work on their relationship may choose a marathon session. These are multi-hour sessions, for half or a full day, that allow the time and space to really work on complex and challenging issues, and the intensity of the time can lead to real change.

It is particularly suited to couples who are time-poor, have limited availability during the week, or simply want a step-change in their relationship.

Make an enquiry and tell me a little about what’s going on, as much or as little as you like. I’ll respond within 2 business days.

Available most weekdays, on some evenings until 9pm, and including limited Saturdays. Please enquire to find available times.

Please give at least 2 days’ notice if you can’t attend. Cancelling with less than 24 hours’ notice incurs a 75% fee.